henry just showed up on our doorstep one day, and after that he'd come by every once in a while to visit. he'd often appear just before i had to deal with something incredibly stressful (like the wedding), and it was like he'd relieve some of that stress, at least momentarily. he was something unexpected in my life, something random that touched me. his chest would usually be all scratched and red from squeezing under the fence in his yard. at a certain point, i observed the 'for sale' sign on his front lawn, and then not much later the 'sold' sticker. the couple that henry belonged to seemed like nice people, but i was not socially adept enough to talk to them, even though i had plenty of opportunities when they came to pick him up. i miss henry.
i like dogs, and have often wished i could have one. i've never been responsible enough or committed enough to life to have one. i liked my sister's dogs a lot, and if they had produced puppies, i would have badly wanted to be responsible enough. the male was older. my sister had had him since he was a puppy, and he was a gentle, sensitive creature. loud noises upset him, and stress often caused him to have seizures. once during a family party he was so nervous he went into a massive moult - after the party was over we found his hair all over the house in huge clumps. (in the middle of winter.) when everyone in my family had left for school and work, and i was alone in the house, i felt that he could sense my despair, and that he wanted to help. if i cried, he would come up to me, and try to lick my tears, and he would look at me with what seemed like compassion, and stay with me until i was calmer. when he died, i spent the day in bed and couldn't stop crying.
i had a cat named pepper that i was very attached to. when we went to visit our grandparents in toronto at xmas once, she disappeared. a friend of the family was checking in on her, but once a cat gets outside it's hard to keep track of it. i had read 'the incredible journey', and i kept waiting for her to show up one day. in spring, when the snow was thawing, i saw some gray fur in the park behind our house. i was afraid to look too closely. i felt ill and ran away. maybe it was her. anyway, i haven't ever wanted a cat since then, although someone tried to give me one once.